Are we following Jesus? Do we use the term “Christian” (or “Christ-One”) to describe ourselves? Do we consider ourselves his disciples—his followers?
I’m struck by the picture of discipleship that I find in Matthew 8:18-22. If a disciple is one who has set her or his life toward following the way of a teacher or leader, the story here really shapes my perspective on the large-scale nature of what it looks like to follow Jesus. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that someone may jump up to follow Jesus without realizing what exactly it is they’re getting themselves into…
Here’s what we find in Matthew 8: Just as Jesus is about to set sail from Capernaum, two “disciples” come up to him. The first one is a scribe, one learned in Jewish law. He comes up boldly proclaiming, “Teacher, I will follow you wherever you go!” I wonder if he really meant, “Oh, this looks like a fun adventure! Can I jump in the boat too?” Jesus doesn’t mince any words. He doesn’t talk about God’s wonderful plan for his life or offer to lead him in a prayer. No, instead Jesus plainly explains the ramifications of his self-professed desire for discipleship: “You want to go with me? Following anywhere I take you? Really??? Well, foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head… Discipleship may require your homelessness…” Apparently the discussion ends there.
But as Jesus turns back and takes a step into the boat, “another disciple” taps our Rabbi on the shoulder. Apparently he was eavesdropping on the discussion with the scribe. He’s maybe a bit more ambitious than the other guy and is willing to sleep standing up if need be. However, this new disciple just needs to take care of something quick. He needs Jesus to hold on a minute and stand there with one foot in the boat while he frees up his schedule. Our new friend asks, “Lord, first let me go and bury my father.” Apparently if you take a good hard look at the culture of the day, it seems to many people that this man’s father might not even be dead yet and that he’s relaying to Jesus his responsibilities to not stray too far until after he’s taken care of things, which may take years. But here’s the thing, whether that’s true or not (and it may very well be his true implication), the thing is: Jesus has a foot in the boat and is ready to set sail for the Gadarenes where he has one or two demon-possessed guys waiting to have their demons exercised. Even if this new disciple has his father’s funeral this afternoon, Jesus really can’t stand around waiting. See, when we’re following Jesus, Jesus is the one who sets the agenda and the schedule. So back in the story, Jesus finally cuts in and says, “Follow me, and let the dead bury their own dead.” In other words, “Are you really going to follow me or not? Do you just want to call yourself one of “Jesus’ disciples” because it sounds hip or cool or adventurous? Cutting-edge maybe? Or do you actually want to jump in this boat and give up your life to help release life in others???” We never see anything else of this guy for all we can tell, and as the boat pushes out to sea this “other disciple” stands on the seashore with his eyebrows squished together.
So what does this tell me about discipleship? Well, it says whole bunches about how following Jesus requires E V E R Y T H I N G of me as a disciple. It tells me I need to at least be willing to be homeless. It tells me I maybe need to consider myself truly homeless. It tells me I need to be willing to drop my agenda or schedule at a moment’s notice in order to receive and enact the instructions he gives me. This brings imagery to my mind of the assistant’s job in The Devil Wears Prada. That did not look very fun. But I’m thinking Jesus probably smiles a bit more than Meryl Streep and sends out for wine rather than coffee…
But it also tells me that being a disciple isn’t necessarily all black-&-white. After all it does say that these two half-hearted individuals were actually “disciples”. They just realized part way through the journey (or two seconds in, but we’ll give em the benefit of a doubt) that it meant a lot more than they originally realized. They had some thinkin to do… It was time to re-evaluate… It seems they did some of that, and though we don’t see them anymore in the story, this doesn’t mean their story ended poorly…
I guess we all come to the point where we realize the call of discipleship is more than we anticipated… the day we realized this isn’t a cruise ship of comfort having everyone fan us like Greek gods while we soak in the sun… when we realized it was more about rowing the boat so we can go toe-to-toe with demonic maniacs in fields of swine… the day we realized this Jesus-thing is more than just checking “Christian” on a census-box…
May we jump in the boat with Jesus. May we maximize our discipleship. And if by chance we’ve stood on the shoreline in the past with eyebrows squished together trying to figure out if this Jesus-thing is really worth it, then may we thank God that Jesus’ boat is coming back around. He calls us to join him and the offer is always open.